España: bitter(sweet)

The final two months of exchange are notoriously known as "bittersweet"... There's a struggle for balance between the life that it's taken you 9 or 10 months to establish in a foreign country and the life that is effortlessly and comfortably waiting for you at home. Simply put, as much as I miss everything I know in the United States, I feel the knawing anticipation of how much I'll miss what I have in Spain. I absolutely feel the bitter- the thought that I will never be in this place with these people in these circumstances is chilling and upsetting. But the sweet has yet to arrive. Maybe I'm just not close enough to my departure date (three weeks from today)... But there is a distinction in that Northfield, Minnesota has it's consistencies and will always be my home base; always. Quarterback Club awaits with it's delicious fish sandwiches and the Cannon River will keep on flowing past Goodbye Blue Monday with the best roasted coffee in town. Northfield is always accessible. Majadahonda and Madrid in Spain are not quite in the same scope of availability. The thought that as each day closes, it's then sent through the paper-shredder, the memories scatter in pieces but the experience as it was in whole isn't going to happen again... The only way to describe that feeling is that it just aches.

As weighty as that all is, it's by no means meant in a depressing manner. This is an anticipated obstacle while on exchange, it's one more thing that reinforces strength and personal growth, and for that I'm incredibly thankful. The past few weeks have been one amazing experience after another. Dancing, sleeping, eating, meeting, visiting, observing and participating, Madrid is forever churning, just waiting for you to get yourself caught up. School came to a tidy close and I'll say my official goodbyes with my classmates at the graduation party at the end of May. There's a constant loop of soccer games playing and there's always music playing in a discoteca. We've gotten pretty unlucky with the weather recently. At the beginning of May, it was 80 degrees and sunny every single day, not a cloud in the sky. But the past week or so it's been cloudy, rainy, and cooler, which of course, I'm not all that thrilled about.

I was lucky enough to meet the upcoming president of the world for next year who came in from India on his way to Chicago to meet with the Spanish Rotary Club in Madrid. He was jolly little man accompanied by his equally fantastic wife who deemed me a "hot mama"... Of all the compliments to recieve it wouldn't have been my first thought but hey, I'm not complaining. This past week has been spent with Lisa from Canada, who is here through a professional exchange also provided by Rotary. She, along with a group of five other young professionals, is here to observe how her field operates in a different country. I've been acting as her tour guide and interpreter around the city. Fortunately, she's a music teacher in the public school systems, so I've gotten to play the xylophone with elementary aged kids and watched a young adult audition to test out of a semi-professional consevatory on the violin, all for free and all provided by Rotary. If you dig deep into this program, it offers endless opportunities.

Routines at home are cherished and precious. Jacobo recently made me a small, beaded crocodile that I'm not quite positive what to do with but I love anyways :) Bea is finishing up school in just a few weeks so she's really loaded down with exams, projects to turn in, and general studying for finals. My host mom and dad are excited to see their son who comes home on June 15 but careful to remind me that I'm welcome 24/7 in any conditions back to their home in Majadahonda, Spain; back to my home.

It's the hardest talking about leaving with my exchange student friends. My Spanish friends are simply in denial that I'll be going, offering such plans as plane sabotages and giant trips to the United States for weeks and months. I feel incredibly fortunate to have made friends in 9 months that care that strongly. My exchange student friends, on the other hand, are more aware of the inevitable finality that awaits us all and watching me have to do it before most of them makes them anxious and puts all of us in a surreal state. Don't get me wrong, Northfield, I still love you dearly. But gosh darn it's hard to say goodbye to such a good thing.

A kiss for you all, Sami

The pictures are all of people... An enormous part of exchange is just the people you surround yourself with, so here's to them